How are you doing in there? I got to see you again this Monday when we had our ultrasound to check on your growth. Looks like you are doing pretty well. Despite how small I may look on the outside (trust me, I don't feel it), you are actually measuring large. Besides the numeric measurements, you also demonstrated how nicely you are readying yourself for the outside world by showing me how you practice the motion of breathing. You further showcased your athletic abilities by stretching and kicking as best as you can in the cramped space. Oh, little one, you are not the only one who is feeling squeezed and squashed. Your little bottom is situated right between my rib cage. Your heart is beating under my bellybutton, and your little head is in my pelvis. To sum it up, there is no more room for my lungs, heart, or other organs anymore.
I've long forgo grace in my movements. So what if I waddle? As long as I can get across a room, I'm happy. Bending is another motion that I can no longer perform. The feeling of having an agile body is but a distant memory. "I'm ready to give birth," I'd tell people with a hand on this solid lump that is you. But then, yesterday, the doctor found out that he's about this close to declaring that I have preeclampsia. Your sister was induced three weeks early because of a trace of it. If I have it this time, you might follow her foot step and arrive early as well. As early as say in two weeks. TWO WEEKS! All of a sudden, I realized that I'm not prepared yet! Yes, your cloths are washed, folded, and put away. And yes, your carseat is all prepped to be set into the car. But... can one really be ready to welcome a new baby? Be ready for the changes that a little new life brings into one's current life? How would you change our family dynamic? How would we continue with the house planning? How would I manage school and your sister and you? I know everything will turn out okay somehow. But I am still nervous and a little scared. Nervous, scared, but sure of one thing, and that is you will be welcomed to this world with plenty of love.
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