Role play

Evelyn has a very active imagination. Often times I'd see her with a far away look in her eyes, walking around dreamily talking to make believe characters. Here's an example. We were at an amusement park this past weekend. We watched as she went on a kiddie Merry-Go-Round by herself. Her father called at her and told her to wave at her sister. I looked at her and told him not to bother. We, on this earth, in this world, were invisible to her who was off in a fairy tale or another. And so it was, she paid us no mind. When the ride was over, I went in to help her unbuckle her seat belt. She slid off the horse, and instead of heading to the exit with me, she paused to "feed the horses apples" first in thanks for their help. Not until the horses were fed did she snap back into this world and raced me off to the next ride.
If I don't have activities planned for her, Evelyn can spend her day spinning stories, pretending to be different people, and interacting with imaginary characters. And of course, I'm often appointed different roles to play. "Your Maleficent and I'm Aurora," was one of the sentences I dread to hear. For it means I would be hunting and capturing her, and she would be captured and then escaped over and over and over again until the cow comes home. These days, though, it's "我是祺祺, 妳是姊姊 (I am Chi-Chi, you are Sister)," that makes me cringe.
It all stemmed from the Chinese children's monthly magazine and DVD. The magazine and its accompanying DVD teach children math and language skills as well as manners and social behaviors, such as ask before taking someone's toy. I wanted it mainly for the girls' Chinese exposure than its content. The main characters are a tiger named 巧虎 (Chow-Hu) and his good friend bunny 祺祺 (Chi-Chi). They learn and navigate through toddler hood with the help of an older girl (Sister) and an older boy (Brother). We've subscribed to it for about a year, and thankfully, it's only this past week that Evelyn began to impersonate the figures in the magazines. While I love it that she strives to speak only in Chinese when she's in Chi-Chi mode, being the sister in this game chafes me in two ways:
1. I don't like to be called a sister by her. I don't know why. I'm her mother, and I want to be called as such. Hearing her call me a sister makes me feel like there's a stick in my shoes, poking at my toes, except, at home, I'm not wearing shoes.
2. Pretending to be a character from the DVD means I have to talk like her. That is, I have to talk in a joyous, upbeat tone with many pauses in the sentence, and end it with a slightly upward tone. Oh, I also have to always be cheerful and have a smile on my face. Who talks like that in real life? Two sentences uttered and I feel so fake, I should be walking with stiff knees and robot hands, like an animated mannequin.
HOWEVER, and this is a big however, when I speak as Sister, Evelyn, no, I mean Chi-Chi, listens and obeys. She follows instructions with a willing and happy "Yeah!"
"Please pick up your toy, Evelyn," gets no response, but "Chi-Chi, please (slight pause) pick up your toy (pause), or you won't be able to find it next time!" and she's swooping down on the mess and cleaning it up in no time.
For this reason alone, I will gladly swallow any dislike of the role playing, and assume Sister whenever called upon. Too bad it doesn't work on the dinner table...

Innocuous

I used the word "innocuous" to describe how poison ivy looks today. "It looks so innocuous," I said.
If you heard my comment in passing, you'd have thought nothing of it. After all, it was a plain, vanilla sentence that contains nothing fancy or worth noting. It was a simple sentence composed of a fitting description chosen from the vast English vocabulary. However, if you observed the deliverance closely, you might have noticed the slight pause in the sentence and the slight twitch of facial muscle before the word was uttered and the sentence was finished.
That pause there? Many things were happening in my head then.
First, there's the recall of the word innocuous.
Then comes the examination. What does the word mean? Does it really mean what I think it means? Where did I learn it? Is that how you pronounce it? Am I going to make a fool of myself by trying to use it?
Following that is the weighing of risks. How sure am I of the word? How stupid would I appear if I made a mistake? How significant would the price be if I used it wrong?
A slight wavering could happen. An internal struggle of whether I should gamble and use the word, or play it safe and swap it out.
Finally, there is the jump. I form the word in my mouth, bring it to my tongue, and let it out.
Once it's out, I secretly hold my breath and wait for the other person's reaction.
No furrowing of brows in confusions? No delay in reaction followed by a "oh, I get it!" realization? Success!

I've lived in this country for 11 years, 7 of which with my English speaking husband. According to him my English has improved dramatically. And yet I find myself still grappling with the language on a daily basis. Vocabulary, especially when speaking, can dessert me like rats jumping off a sinking ship. Grammar is that slippery soap that, just when I think I got a handle on it, escapes my grasp and falls off the floor with a clunk. If I made a mistake in a conversation and became aware of it, oh my, the language turns its cold shoulders at me and pretend that we are strangers. Then the babbling comes in and the sense making goes out the window. In no time, my children will be correcting my speech. And if they dare roll their eyes while doing so, I shall thank them by speaking in Chinese only.

House rules

One.
As the father of the children grew up here and is an avid sports fan:
"Evelyn, what do you say about Red Sox and Yankees?"
"Yeah Red Sox! (with thumbs up) Boo Yankees! (with thumbs down)"
"And what happens if you say Boo Red Sox?"
"No dessert!!"

Two.
We want our girls to be well mannered. Therefore, after each meal, the one that can already speak needs to ask for permission before she can leave the table. Sometimes, getting her to do so is harder than pulling out a tooth. For example, after lunch today she started sliding off her chair without saying anything. Her Nanny (Grandmother) stopped her mid-slid and asked her what she should say. Evelyn begin to play dumb. This and that she'd chat, just not what we wanted to hear. Hints were given. No bite. Finally, I told her she needs to ask the magic question or else she can't leave.
"Today's magic word is Abracadabra!" she declared. "And the longer version is Evelyn-Lauren-Mommy-Janey. Oh, and Janey ate a green dinosaur." On and on she spun a tale of how Janey ate a green dinosaur. The story ended with "And that's today's magic word."
It was clear that she knows what was expected of her. It was also clear that she was not going to deliver and would go to great lengths to avoid doing so. It gotten so bad that her Nanny had to cover her mouth and turn away for her desire to laugh was about to take over. Finally, her Nanny made today an exception and set her free. Or else, I could see us, at 3 in the afternoon, still sitting there with me asking her about the magic question, and with her spinning her tale.